Walnuts, Peanuts, and Religous Nuts

I just saw Bill Maher's new film, Religulous. It was fantastic and I enjoyed it thoroughly. He did a good job portraying the absurdity of religion, all religion, in a way that was not offensive or sarcastic as to turn the people who really need to see this film off from it.

Of course I am talking about religious people. People that think they talk to Jesus or Allah. Or better yet, that God talks to them. As I grow older I find it amazing that adults actually believe in these stories. A talking snake, a virgin birth, a zombie Lord, and a burning bush seem to me like kid stories. Perhaps this is because I believed them when I was a kid. But then, you have to wonder about the adults that were teaching your Sunday school. Do they actually believe all of these things? There had to be some of the shit they were passing out as divine truth that gave them pause, right?

Teaching your child good moral values is one of the responsibilities of a parent, but can't we come up with some way to do it other than force feeding them fairy tales that could lead to many years of disillusionment and frustration when the facade begins to crack? It is almost unthinkable to me that any parent would be OK with teaching their child all the bells and whistles of their religion which always boil down to this: we are going to heaven and everyone else is going to hell.

As you grow older there comes a time when you're old enough to be told that Santa Claus is not real. Or at least inquire a bit further into it. What do you mean that he visits every house all in one night? What does he do the rest of the year, and how come I have never seen an elf? Oh, he's not real? What about Jesus?

A big one to me is the claim that the Earth is 5000 years old and was created in seven days. Now, I know people that are intelligent, rational human beings in a variety of aspects in their lives that believe this. New rule: if you are going to spit in the face of scientific discovery so you don't have to let go of your imaginary friend, then you have to give up the conveniences that scientific discovery affords us. Like cell phones, computers, electricity and the Internet. A friend of mine from high school recently corrected me when I used the rounded term "5000 years old" to refer to Earth. It's closer to 6200 years old according to scripture, he said. Well, I'll be damned.

This is the fundamental problem with religion. It causes people to be crazy and to manifest their insanity into the world we all share. It makes people believe things about themselves, their relationship with others, and their relationship with God that simply are not true. When you bring up some of the gaping holes in their story they assert that they have "faith," simultaneously implying that you do not. There is simply nothing virtuous about believing strongly in something for which there is no evidence. That's called being stubborn and thick headed. Some of the creationists say that God placed evidence, like dinosaur fossils that are millions of years old, to test their faith. That's right, God is just fucking with us. That bastard.

Some of the beliefs are more harmful than others. If you believe that Jesus was born of a virgin, ultimately that is fine. But if you believe that the book of Revelation, or the Islamic prophecies about the End Times are real, then the potential to bring real harm into this world is greatly increased. Millions of Christians would see a silver lining in a mushroom cloud over Jerusalem and point to it as one of the signs of the Second Coming of Christ. The nuclear holocaust thing, us humans can pull of without God's help which is why it is so dangerous to believe it is going to happen, or to even hasten its arrival because of our wacky fairy tales. It's seems odd to me that people can't just accept that that the future is unwritten and we as a civilization have the power to steer it in one direction or another. But all of our religions have some sort of story about how all the shit is going to go down, and people believe it. Self fulfilling prophecy, anyone?

The burden is not on the nonreligious to disprove religion. The Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy cannot ultimately be disproven. Just highly unlikely. If you want to believe in a guy that lived for three days in the belly of a great fish, fine. But don't get all defensive when someone tells you that you are full of shit. Because you are.

My favorite part of the movie is when Bill interviews one of the ex-gay ministers. Ex gays are hilarious for so many reasons, and I can really appreciate the absurdity because I used to strive to be one. They don't believe in gay people and therefore are both confused and confusing. But it is fun to watch them scwerm and try to explain to Bill Maher, who does believe in gay people, their view of things. Bill just sits there and flirts with them, and they don't get it. Priceless.

True spirituality, which can be arrived at through religion but almost never is, should be commended. It can heal your body, reconcile you back to your divine nature, dissolve conflict in the world, and cook you dinner. Religion, however, is ridiculous and Bill Maher made a movie about it. Go check it out and invite one of your religious friends. It will lead to some very provocative conversations.